Led Me Straight to You
by colormeorAnge
Summary: Meredith and Derek date in school, but then something pulls them apart and are brought back together under surprising circumstances. MERDER
1. She Is

ahh i do not own any part of Grey's Anatomy. That woudl be Shonda.

So this is jut something a little different. Derek and Meredith are dating and they are both living in Boston and in highschool. Meredith is going to be a sophomore and Derek's gonna be a senior. and i have NO idea where it's gonna go from here so haaang around. I also don't know how often my updates will be, between school, the dreaded homework, volleyball, football stats, and work--I will definitely do my best tho!

* * *

4 girls and 1 boy were scattered around the living room of Collin and Anna Shepherd. The three oldest girls were sitting on the black leather couch according to age, a habit they formed when they were little, although they never actually meant to do it. Jamie – 26; was devouring a hunk of chocolate and had one hand gently rubbing her very pregnant stomach, Holly – 23; had her head back with her eyes closed, trying to recover from last nights festivities, Erika – 22 was sitting with her legs crossed at the ankles, reading the paper. To her left, Derek – 18 was sprawled out on a matching love seat with his arm over his head, waiting for his parents to drop whatever they had to tell them all, so he could go out. Across the room from him, Avery – 13 was sitting on the floor with her back against the wall, flipping through a Seventeen magazine. None of them knew what was so important that they all had to be there, but their parents were still in the kitchen talking quietly, and everyone was becoming restless.

"Mom, Dad! Seriously, come oooon." Avery was the first to speak up as she flopped her magazine beside her.

"What do you have that's so important? Gonna miss an episode of Sesame Street?" Derek said annoyed as he lifted his arm off his face and sat up.

"Don't even act like you don't want to leave and go see Meeeredith so you can suck her face. And plus, Sesame Street is on at 4."

Derek raised his eyebrows at her and smirked, " ha, so you do watch Sesame Street. You have no life, honetly, you know what I was doing when I was your age? Well I'll tell you, not sitting at home on a Friday night."

"I hate you! I do have a life! Just because I'm not out getting totally hammered every weekend doesn't' mean I don't have a life!" Avery yelled.

" ugh.. SHUT UP!" Holly yelled from the couch with her head still leant back and her eyes still glued shut.

"You have no idea how glad I am that I don't live here anymore." Erika said in her normal hoity toity voice.

"Oh why don't you just go shove a cucumber in your mouth and see how glad you are then." Avery said from the wall, and the rest all laughed as Erika rolled her eyes and let out a huff.

"I hope my kids aren't like us." Jamie said with a smile on her face as her parents walked into the living room. "k, so what do you have to tell us?"

"Kids, this will only actually affect Derek and Avery, because they're the only two that technically still live with us, but girls, I um, I got a new job." Collin spoke in a quiet voice that the kids had only heard a few times before. When he used this voice, nothing good was to come.

Erika was instantly interested, she was the proper, business like, do-gooder family member and the rest found it extremely annoying. "Well Dad that's fantastic, that boss of yours was an asshole anyways and hardly knew what he was actually doing."

"Erika, let your father finish." Anna said with tears in her eyes.

" I ahh, guys I got transferred to New York, we're moving in a week..i know its short notice but, it's better pay, and I'm actually really excited to start with this new area in my career." Their father looked around the room for everyone's reactions. Jamie and Holly looked shocked, but Jamie was already married, and Holly was engaged, so the move didn't really affect them much. Erika looked unaffected and actually happy for her father, while Avery had tears streaming down her face and instantly got up and ran to her room with Anna chasing after her. Derek, who he figured it would be hardest on with him starting his senior year and would probably eventually break up with Meredith, turned pale and had his hands in his lap.

" I ahh, I have to go get some of our things straightened out, your Aunt Carly is going to watch the house until it gets sold, and you know, I'm really sorry about this, especially to you Derek. I know this is going to be hard, but you can still come back, its only about a 4 ½ hour drive, I.." Collin was cut off by Derek getting off the couch.

"Yea Dad, I know, don't worry about it.." Derek trailed off and walked to his room without shedding a tear. All he wanted right now was Meredith in his arms.

_**Do not get me wrong I cannot wait for you to come home  
For now you're not here and I'm not there, it's like we're on our own  
To figure it out, consider how to find a place to stand  
Instead of walking away and instead of nowhere to land**_

_**This is going to break me clean in two  
This is going to bring me close to you**_

_**She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted  
She is everything I want that I never knew I needed**_

_**It's all up in the air and we stand still to see what comes down  
I don't know where it is, I don't know when, but I want you around  
When it falls in place with you and I, we go from if to when  
Your side and mine are both behind it's indication**_

_**This is going to bring me clarity  
This'll take the heart right out of me**_

_**She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted  
She is everything I want that I never knew I needed**_

_**This is going to bring me to my knees  
I just want to hold you close to me**_

_**She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted  
She is everything I want that I never knew I needed**_

_**SHE IS - THE FRAY **_

_basically i chose this song for this chapter because no one knows how the kids are gonna take it and Derek doesn't know whats going to happen between him and mer. _


	2. All Messed Up

Sadly, don't owe any part of Grey's :( or Patrick Dempsey..

Sooo. this chapter, the next, and then one after that i think will be high school still. and then we'll jump a year or two when Dereks in college and well..ahah. YOU'LL SEE. Oh. and in my story, Meredith is a volleyball star. wooooooot. And cause i know rules vary in each state, i'm just gonna go by rules of South dakota cause that'd be where i live. and no. we're not all hicks. yes, farming is a big thing around here, but i mean, its not like we run around in overalls singing folk songs. :D AND ANOTHER THING. Mer lives in Boston right now. She's gonna end up moving to Seattle, so its kind of mixed up from how it is in the show..and Thatcher and Ellis are still together FOR NOW. but yea..we'll see how that goes, k?

6 miles away, a game of Texas Hold em' was going on. Christina, Preston, George, Izzie, and Alex were very into the game, while Meredith and Finn were sitting close by telling jokes as Meredith tipped back the tequila bottle. Finn had a crush on Meredith, he always had. He was going to be a junior and he had joined their group when he going into his freshman year. Him and Meredith had been on the road to dating around Halloween last year, they were actually on a date when she met Derek. _Ohh Derek._ Anything Finn did could not compete with Derek. But he cherished the moments when Meredith would come to him when her and Derek had a fight, it always seemed to give him a little bit of hope. Of course, tonight Meredith was waiting on a phone call from Derek.

"Oh man, do you remember when were almost DATING? I mean seriously. Me and YOU. How..crazy weird. Talk about AWKwaaaard." Meredith was already very tipsy, and Finn knew it'd be one of those nights where she wouldn't remember a damn thing in the morning.

" Ahh yea..talk about weird." Finn flashed a fake smile and took a sip of his beer. He had never really been much of a drinker, but with Meredith, he always wanted too.

"OH, and remember when I used to call you MERMAID. Ahh. Mermaid. Merman. Finn the Merman.. huh. It fits you." Meredith took another gigantic drink from the tequila bottle. As she was setting it down on the floor next to her, Lips of An Angel ringtone blast from her cellphone and Meredith let out a loud squeal. That was her ringtone for Derek, and Finn was unbelievably jealous. Finn got the wonderful Milkshake, and had to share it with 10 other people. Derek of course got his own.

"Hey baby.." Finn heard Meredith say as she went to sit on the front porch.

"Mer..hun whatcha up to?" Meredith could tell the sadness in Derek's voice.

"Hangin' out at Christina's, what're you doin tonight? Wanna come over?"

Meredith was very anxious. Her and Derek had been experimenting lately, while never actually having sex, and Meredith wanted tonight to be the night. At East Boston High, if you were still a virgin by the time you were a sophomore, you were basically given a bad name if anyone found out.

" Ahh Mer, I think I'm gonna stay home tonight, but I was thinkin', my parents are gonna be gone tomorrow night, I want to make you dinner." Meredith was very surprised by the fact that Derek wasn't coming out, he always loved spending time with her, why not tonight?

"Babe..whats wrong? You don't sound right.."

"We um, we need to talk Meredith.. I have something I need to tell you.." The way Derek said "We need to talk" was the same way Meredith had always broke up with her boyfriends. She would NOT be humiliated by Derek Shepherd breaking up with her. Two can play at this game she thought.

"Huh, talk..right. Ok tomorrow night. I'll meet you at your house, how about 7?"

"Yea that sounds great, love ya Mer.." Meredith couldn't but think that Derek sounded almost broken as he said this, and all she wanted to do was cry. Why would he tell her he loved her if he was just going to break her heart. _Boys can be so fucking dumb_ she thought to herself.

"Yea sure..later." She snapped the phone shut and moved the swing back and forth thinking about what she was going to do when tomorrow night came.

_**I hope I never wake up  
I dream about you all the time now  
And I don't wanna face  
Another night without you here  
Someday, someway, somehow  
We will be together again  
You know I've always wanted  
Just to feel the touch of your love  
You know I've always hated  
Knowing how far apart we are  
Someday, someway, somehow  
We will be together again  
I just want you to know**_

_**CHORUS:  
Baby I'm all messed up in you  
You're far away  
But you're here with me  
Baby I'm all messed up in you  
You're all I need  
My everything**_

_**Every night i wake up  
Hoping that I'll find you here and  
There's not a day that goes by  
I don't think about your smile  
Someday, someway, somehow  
We will be together again  
I just want you to know**_

_**CHORUS**_

_**And I know that we will find a way  
To be together someday  
And I promise you that I won't leave  
I'll be here forever**_

_**CHORUS**_

_**I want you  
I need you  
I'm lost here without you  
I'm all messed up in you  
I hope i never wake up  
I dream about you all the time now.**_

_** All Messed Up - Breaking Point  
**_

_ahh THIS SONG because derek is thinking about meredith and just HAS to call her, and yea idk. no real reason, i jut like the song :D**  
**_


	3. Chocolate

Greys anatomy isn't mine. shooooot.

one more chapter after this will be high school and then we'll move a little in time. oh and the next chapter most likely won't be up tomorrow, cause i hate a conference volleyball tourney game, and i'm starting. i hardly play on varsity and i'm starting. so i'm somewhat nervous. and upset. because basically i'm now off jv. and i LOVE it :) its my team ya know. i'm their setter. now i'm varsity's setter. tsk tsk. oh and i'll get home pretty damn late cause the game is a couple hours away but yea. anywaaaays. ENJOY.

Meredith had been swinging back and forth on the front porch when Finn came out searching for her. She broke down instantly and told him about their conversation and what she thought Derek was going to do. Finn took this as his chance. He knew it'd be wrong, but this was Meredith Grey we were talking about here. The Meredith Grey that was thought of to be the girl that would lead their volleyball team to state. The Meredith Grey that was smart, beautiful, and outrageously funny. The Meredith Grey who was the daughter of THE Ellis Grey. She was everything he wanted.

"Mer, why do you do this to yourself? There's so many better guys out there.."

"Finn, boys are stupid. They can't all be like you." Meredith hadn't meant it in a way that she meant she liked Finn, but it had been the way it came out.

"So what about me? Why not me? Mer, I could treat you so much better.. Meredith, I've always liked you.. since the first day I laid my eyes on you, forget Derek. Love me Meredith. Love me." Meredith looked up into Finn's eyes. He was like her brother, but she knew that whatever she was about to do would hurt Derek, and that's exactly what she wanted to do.

In an instant, Meredith's lips were on Finn's and heat was traveling through both of their bodies. As Finn went to deepen the kiss, Meredith slid over to straddle Finn, while never breaking their lips. As Finn lifted her up and started walking to his car so no one could see them, Meredith played with the hem of his shirt and only one thought raced through her mind, "I wanted to have sex tonight, and I am GOING to have sex tonight, even with Finn."

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

Derek laid on his bed with his thoughts and the music form his ipod mixing as one. _Not even a week. How could his parents spring this on them so fast. All he had was Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. _He figured that most of this time would be occupied with Meredith. He didn't even want to think about tomorrow night. He was mostly scared that Meredith would hate him. She was the first girl that he ever loved and he didn't want to lose her. He missed her now. She was the only thing that was occupying his thoughts. _Screw it, I'm gonna go find her._

10 minutes later, Derek pulled up in front of Christina Yang's house and sprinted inside. Everyone was completely wasted in the house, but he didn't see Meredith.

"Georgie boy where's Mer?" George hated the nickname but he was too gone to know any better.

"uhh..probably in the bathroom. Or SLEEPING. Yea yea..sleep. she may be SLEEPING shepherd. So SHHH." George was yelling and Derek couldn't help but smirk at him. He was going to miss these guys.

Derek raced up the stairs and started opening every door. He came to Christina's and heard a bit of noise in there, but he wasn't sure if he saw Christina down there or not. _Ahh who cares._ He said as he kicked the door open and turned ghostly white at the site before him.

"Mer..m-m-meredith..I..Finn? How could..why would..oh my god.. I can't..unbelievable.."

**_This could be the very minute  
I'm aware I'm alive  
All these places feel like home_**

**_With a name I'd never chosen  
I can make my first steps  
As a child of 25_**

**_This is the straw, final straw in the  
Roof of my mouth as I lie to you  
Just because I'm sorry doesn't mean  
I didn't enjoy it at the time_**

**_You're the only thing that I love  
It scares me more every day  
On my knees I think clearer_**

**_Goodness knows I saw it coming  
Or at least I'll claim I did  
But in truth I'm lost for words_**

**_What have I done it's too late for that  
What have I become truth is nothing yet  
A simple mistake starts the hardest time  
I promise I'll do anything you ask...this time  
_**

**_Chocolate - Snow Patrol _**

_ I guess this song is more towards the next chapter sooorta. cause ya know. meredith is sorry and all but i mean, she's sorry now too when he walked in..and its like a FORESHADOW. my english teacher would be proud. :D  
_


	4. My Wish

**First of all, SO SORRY! its definitely been a hectic few weeks, and I just ahh.. kept putting writing this off. So last update I said it'd be a couple days cause I had a volleyball conference thing..well I sprained my ankle during that game bummer I know. So I've been out of it for a couple weeks and this week was my first week back, so that's not really an excuse..but I was a little on the bitchy side not being able to play and well heh..i just didn't do it. Also homework sucks. But I've had ideas playing in my head so here we go :D AND I'm sorta skipping into the Tuesday/Wednesday area when Derek's moving..**

**oh of course I don't own a darn thing.**

Since Derek had found Finn and Meredith, both had been a mess. Derek threw himself into packing for New York, hardly going out, he said goodbye to his close friends of course, but it just hurt too much to have fun.

Meredith was like a walking zombie. Christina and Izzie had attempted to drag her out of the house, but she just couldn't go. They always found her lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling thinking about Derek and that night.

"_Derek wait!" Merdith yelled after him as he immediately darted down the stairs, surprisingly looking calm, but definitely not feeling it. Meredith was only missing her shirt and Finn his, but had Derek arrived 5 minutes later and he would have found them in the throws. _

"_DEREK PLEASE!" she didn't bother to grab a coat as he walked out the door with a quicker than normal pace into the pouring rain. _

"_Derek..i'm SORRY" Meredith began to sob as she ran to catch with him and grabbed his arm. Derek shrugged her off but stopped walking._

"_I don't know what I was thinking, Finn was there to comfort me, and you..Derek you have to believe me, I'm so sorry.." tears were streaming down her cheeks and Derek couldn't help but notice she wasn't wearing a jacket. This was the girl he loved, he couldn't just let her stand there in the rain and get sick. He shrugged his coat off and wrapped it around her shoulders, he breathed in the scent of her hair and tears immediately sprang to his eyes. But as quickly as the memory of Finn and Meredith left him, it came back. He abruptly pulled bad and Meredith looked up with pleading eyes. _

"_What the hell did you need comforting for anyways?" Anger started pouring out of him, and he knew that he wasn't going to be able to hold it back._

"_You said we needed to talk..i thought you were going to break up with me. Finn was there and he said all these things and they just felt so right, and I needed to hear them, and now I'm starting to ramble and Derek..please look at me.." Derek had been looking everywhere except at the girl before him._

"_I can't. I can't look at you because everytime I do, I picture HIM with his hands on YOU. Meredith, I fucking love you, I wasn't going to break up with you. But now, now we're through..we're done. I can't do it." Derek didn't want to be done..he wanted her. But the anger wasn't letting him think and he couldn't handle being around her._

"_No..please no.."_

_  
"Goodbye Meredith." With that Derek turned around and Meredith couldn't help but think that the goodbye sounded more like he was leaving for good._

It seemed as if Meredith's life was falling apart all around her. First Derek left her, and yesterday when her dad left for work, he never came back. Later that night her mom told her that they decided they were getting a divorce. It was all too much. Her cellphone began vibrating on her computer desk to break her out of her thoughts. It had rang constantly that last few days but she had never bothered to look who was calling. She looked at it the id and was surprised to see _Derek_ on the screen. Before she was able to flip it open the call ended. She checked her recent calls and saw that it had been Derek that was calling her. _Damn it._ Without thinking she picked up her purse and keys and ran out to her car to go over to Derek's.

_Damn it Meredith_. As much as he didn't want to talk to her, he needed to tell her he was moving. He was still obviously stupidly in love with her, as much as he wish he wasn't. There seemed to be a lot that he wished he didn't have to do. He really wished he wasn't moving.

"You ready to go son?" His dad patted him on the back as he walked to their car, breaking him of his thoughts.

"Ahh yea I'll be there in a second. I guess this is goodbye." He said to the phone, wishing somehow that Meredith would hear it and that things could just go back to a week ago, then things would be different. _Whatever, wishing is for idiots who need to learn to grow up._

Meredith drove up and parked on the side of the road. She couldn't help but notice things looked a little different for some reason. All Derek's mother's signs and plants were down. _Huh..must be cleaning_. Meredith got out of the her car and looked around the lawn again. There was a For Sale sign not too far away from, and as her eyes started to water up, a realtor came out of the house and Meredith ran up to her.

"Excuse me, ma'am, why is there a for sale sign here?"

" Well dear, the family has decided to relocate, may I ask who you are?"

" I'm, I'm a neighbor. I've been out of town for awhile, and my ahh, my mom wanted me to come over and borrow some milk, but I guess a lot has happened since we've been gone. Do you know when they moved and where?"

"I'm sorry honey, you just missed them. They were moving to New York, Mr. Shepherd got a different job of some sort. You look around the age of the oldest boy. What a nice young man, looked like he had a broken heart though. Poor boy, only had a week warning that they were moving. I can't imagine that, I'd be heartbroken too."

Meredith had tears threatening to stream down her face. _That's what he had to talk about, oh my god..how could I be so stupid? _"Yea he was a good friend of mine, thank you ma'am, have a nice day."

"You too darling."

Meredith drove the way home with tears barely falling down her cheeks. It hadn't quite hit her yet that not only did Derek leave her, but he REALLY left. She would never see him again. When she got home she was surprised to see her mom already home and boxes scattered around the living room.

"Hey mom, whats all this?"

"Meredith, honey, I can't be in the same city as your father, we're moving to Seattle..I'm so..i'm so sorry." With that Meredith just nodded her head and went up to her room where she began sobbing uncontrollably.

**_I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,  
And each road leads you where you want to go,  
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,  
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.  
And if one door opens to another door closed,  
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,  
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,_**

**_But more than anything, more than anything,  
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,  
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,  
You never need to carry more than you can hold,  
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,  
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,  
Yeah, this, is my wish._**

**_I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,  
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,  
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,  
And you help somebody every chance you get,  
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,  
And you always give more than you take._**

**_But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,  
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,  
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,  
You never need to carry more than you can hold,  
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,  
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,  
Yeah, this, is my wish._**

**_This is my wish  
I hope you know somebody loves you  
May all your dreams stay big_**

**_ My Wish - Rascal Flatts_**

_  
okay so even though derek is moving, he still wants meredith to be ok, to move on. thats kind of what i was thinking when he was still trying to call her to tell her, he still wants her to he happy, he loves her. so ya know..yea._**_  
_**


	5. A Lonely September

**So now its about 3 years ahead in time. Derek was going to be senior when he moved and now he's in his 2nd year of college, so yea, that's three years. Mer's a senior in high school and is owning it up on the volleyball court. Addison is now entered in too. Personally, I like Addison, she's freaking hilarious and just..fun. But her and Derek? Ahh no. Derek and Meredith? Ahh yes ma'am! Anyways, Addison's a freshman in college and yes, her and Derek are dating, and Addison was always meant for a big city like New York, but grew up in a town near Seattle, oh and she MAYBE played volleyball which means she MAYBE played Meredith..muahaha. Here we go. I'm also not familiar with towns around Seattle, so I looked at a map and it looked like Bellevue was close..never heard of it, but yea, we're going with that.**

**Don't own a thing.**

"Addie, tell me again why were have to travel across the country to watch a high school volleyball game?" Derek and Addison were flying over South Dakota (**yay!) **about now and Derek was completely confused about why a volleyball game was such a big deal.

"Derek, its not just any volleyball game, its state volleyball, and it's a big game."

"Well do you care to enlighten me on why its such a big game?"

"The high-school I went to made it again and they're playing the same team that we played last year for state. Honestly, it was such a good game, we should have won, but they had this little junior, obviously a senior this year, anyways, she's so good. She moved there when she was like a sophomore and rumor was she was on varsity as an 8th grader and she started the year she started going to Seattle. Anyways, they're an awesome team. So I just, I wanted to see it, and my little sister plays volleyball. She's only a freshman and she's not on varsity, but it'll be nice to see her again. Are you sure you don't mind coming with me?" Addison looked over at Derek nervously.

"Of course not baby, it'll be fun." Derek smiled and grabbed her hand, of course he hadn't liked volleyball since he moved to New York. Ever since Meredith volleyball was ruined for him, not that he really enjoyed it that much to start with. But this girl he was talking about started somewhat like Meredith herself. Derek forced himself to rid his head of thoughts of her. He rarely thought of her, and they began to get less and less.

"Dereeeek! Come on!"

"Addie! Calm down! They're just announcing the starting line up, I've got to pee ok!" Derek chuckled at how excited she was to be back.

"I'm going in so you can come find me when you're done." Addison kissed him on the cheek quickly and started walking towards the gym. The game had barely started when Derek came back. He loved watching Addison get worked up about the good and the bad things her old school was doing. Derek was about to throw some popcorn in his mouth when one of the middle players for Seattle hit the ball down at Bellevue and it ended up landing in front of the 10 foot line and bounced straight up because of the force the girl used.

"Holy shit." Derek said with his mouth full.

"See! That's the girl! I told you she was a monster. Man, she was the girl I always loved to hate."

"Why'd you hate her Addie?"

"She had everything but yet nothing."

"How is that even possible?" Derek chuckled.

"Well I talked to her at a party once, she was major wasted. It was around the time she was beginning to be known as the girl that was as good on her knees as she was on the volleyball court. Anyways, her mom's an amazing surgeon and known like all over the world but before she started her sophomore year her parents split and her and her mom moved to Seattle." Addison chuckled a little, "man she was a hoot when she was plastered, she told me how about a week before she found out she was moving she was in the "process" of undressing one of her guy friends when her boyfriend walked in on them. Pretty messy break up I guess and it ended with him moving and he never told her." At this Derek's face began to pale as he looked at the girl on the court. _It couldn't be.._ " I mean can you imagine that? BAM, in one week, you get caught in bed by your boyfriend, he breaks up with you, him and your father just get up and leave with no telling, and your mother springs it on you you're moving." _Her dad left? I wonder when.._

"Addison, what did you say her mothers name was again?" Derek looked back at Addison, he was pretty sure that it was Meredith out there, but he honestly couldn't get a good look at her.

"ahh, Ellis COME ON GIRLS LETS GO, LETS DO THIS! Grey. Why are you so curious about this girl Derek?"

"I'm not, its just an interesting story is all. Do you have a program?" Addison handed it to him and Derek read the program.

_#12 Allison Stratford_

_#34 Erica Brown_

_#11Meredith Grey_

_#10Hannah Wahler_

Just as his eyes settled on Meredith's name, he heard Addison yell.

"Derek!"

He looked up too the one and the only Meredith Grey flying at him as the ball was about to land right in his lap seeing how they were sitting on the bottom row of the bleachers. Meredith managed to put an arm out and save the ball back into the court before it hit Derek, but she didn't end up stopping herself from punching him right in the nose with her other hand. Blood was all around his nose and on her hand but she had first turned back to the game to see if they would score the winning point.

"YES!" Meredith screeched and threw an arm in the air. She saw the blood on it and remembered what she did. She immediately turned around to look at Derek but didn't recognize him.

"OMG! I am SO sorry! Stay here, I gotta slap hands and then I'll bring you to the coaches office to clean it up and get some ice." Meredith ran off to get in line to slap hands and Derek just sat there stunned that she hadn't noticed who he was. She made sure she slapped with the hand that wasn't bloody and then ran back up to Derek.

"Here, follow me." Derek got up and tilted his head back holding his nose. Addison started to get up too but Derek turned back around.

"Addison you don't have to come, it's only going to take about 15 minutes."

"Derek, I want to come." Addison sounded very unconvincing.

"Adds, no you don't. Why don't you go talk to your parents and old team members. Its okay babe."

"Thanks hun." Addison squeezed his hand affectionately and Derek couldn't but feel guilty that really he just wanted to be alone with Meredith. But when Derek turned back around he didn't see Meredith anywhere so he turned back around to look for her. She came up to him and tapped him on the back making him jump.

Meredith smirked at him. She couldn't help but think he looked familiar, his eyes especially. He made her feel comfortable for some reason and it scared her a little. "Hey stranger, this way." She tilted her head toward the stairs which led to the office.

Once down there Meredith dampened a cloth.

"Sit." She indicated to the chair in front of her. She tilted his head bed and started dabbing at the blood. Derek winced in pain when she touched the bridge of his nose.

"huh, I got you good I guess. But I mean, it's great that we won right?"

"Well ya know actually, I was here for the other time."

"I guess I actually didn't you hard enough then." Meredith pulled back the cloth and smiled at him.

Derek chuckled, "Oh trust me, I don't need you to hit me any harder. So what's you name number 11?"

"Meredith."

"I know." Derek smiled flirtily at her. He missed this. He missed her. It scared him how fast all these feelings were coming back.

"But you just said.. you're a funny man."

"I try." Trying to think of something to talk about that would bug her, he couldn't stop smiling. He decided to start giving her tips about volleyball. She always hated that.

"You know, if you snapped your wrist a little more and maybe worked on your approach you could hit the ball a little harder." She stopped cleaning up his nose and looked down at him skeptically.

"Please tell me you're not giving me tips. Did you even WATCH the game tonight?" she thought this man was crazy, he must not know anything about the game.

"Of course I did, which is why I'm telling you." He smiled dreamily at her which took her breath away. She knew that smile.._it couldn't be.._ she just scowled down at him and placed the ice on his nose forcefully.

"HEY! That hurts! I was just kidding!"

"You big baby." She smiled at him and started searching for some ibuprofen through the cupboards.

"I was seriously just kidding, you played an awesome game Mer, I always knew you'd be good.." Derek didn't realize what he had said until he was done saying it. _Shit._ He heard her stop rummaging around but he didn't hear her coming towards him or anything.

"What's your name?"

"..Derek." Meredith closed her eyes and sighed. She missed him so much. She knew it was him, she just wouldn't believe it. There was no way. She went and sat in the chair next to him.

"I've missed you.." she said softly. He had never done anything to hurt her, besides move away. But Preston had told her as she was saying goodbye to Christina and Izzie before she moved how he had been trying to tell her. It was all her fault. She felt him stare at her and the warmth of his hand found hers.

"I've missed you too.." his voice cracked a little and she knew that he was thinking back to when they were together.

"I hurt you."

"You did."

"and now you've moved on.."

"But you've always been in my heart." They were staring into each others eyes now and Derek started leaning in to kiss her when they were interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Mer! Come on! Josh is having a major blowout!" Emery yelled from the other side of the door, it was locked so she wasn't able to get in, but the two broke apart anyways and Meredith stood up to talk by the door.

"Yea, Em, I'll meet you there kay?"

"Alright, make sure you line up a driver!"

"Yea yea, bye." Meredith was trying to get her to stop talking and it had worked.

"So.." Derek started.

"Ahh yea." Mer turned back around only to find Derek standing right in front of her.

_**I'm sittin' here all by myself  
just tryin' to think of something to do  
Tryin' to think of something, anything  
**_

_**just to keep me from thinking of you**_

_**But you know it's not working out**_

_**'cause you're all that's on my mind**_

_**One thought of you is all it takes**_

_**to leave the rest of the world behind**_

_**Chorus  
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did  
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did**_

_**I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself  
that you're not the one for me  
But the more I think, the less I believe it  
and the more I want you here with me  
You know the holidays are coming up  
I don't want to spend them alone  
Memories of Christmas time with you  
will just kill me if I'm on my own**_

_**Chorus  
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did  
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back**_

_**I know it's not the smartest thing to do  
we just can't seem to get it right  
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight  
One more chance tonight**_

_**I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar  
But with all my inspiration gone it's not getting me very far  
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you  
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand  
we've got nothing left to prove**_

_**Chorus  
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did  
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did**_

_**And I didn't mean to meet you then  
we were just kids  
And I didn't mean to give you chills  
the way that I kiss  
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did  
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did  
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did  
No, you didn't mean to love me back  
But you did**_

_** A Lonely September - Plain White T's**_

_ok so i LOVE this song, part of the reasons i put it as this chapter because i love this chapter also :) but ALSO because i mean, they both still thinkg about eachother but not really, and they try and push it back, but once they see eachother, all these feelings come back and i mean WHOA crazy sex hormones. -- haha, that i just said to my friend. so i put it on here. her mom gave her a sex talk..fuuuucking funny.**  
**_


	6. Authors Note sorry guys! not an update!

Sooo I KNOW this isn't a chapter..but I added songs to my previous chapters :D and I am SO sorry for not updating. School has been completely crazy lately and I just haven't been able to find the time..but volleyballs almost done now so I'll have more time. YAY! I'll try and update this week sometime maybe, it depends on the homework, but my last game is on November 2nd, so after that, FOR SURE, and hopefully if not this week, this weekend, I don't have a tourney and this week I did. Again..SORRY GUYS!

3


	7. Here Is Gone

Ok put away the torches and please don't kill me :) I'm sooo sorry guys! I just..kept putting it off and now I'm sitting here bored and I'm like well hey! Remember that one story you started awhile back..yea that one! Write a chapter how about? And so..here I am.. and honestly idk how much longer I'll go with it, I have seriously no idea where I'm actually taking it. NO IDEA. But I guess here's my shot at it.. ohh and ya know the volleyball game right? Well that wasn't the championship game..theres still one left..i think.heck I don't know if I'll have one left or not..i'll decide..later.

I oooobviously do not own greys anatomy as you see because well..i don't update much..Shonda gives us one every week :D

PS: this is some crappy writing..but ya know.. it happens. && its not that long..soooorrrry.. school's a bitch.

* * *

Meredith gasped at how close Derek was. "Hi." She managed out without wavering eye contact

"Hi." Derek smiled his smile that made every girl weak in the knees and started to lower his lips to hers. Meredith could hardly breath with him this close and his scent filling her nostrils while his breath was tingling her neck because of his closeness. This was all too familiar and the past came rushing back.

"Derek..Derek no." she stumbled out. Derek raised his head and took a few steps back.

"I'm sorry Mer, just, I can't believe its actually you.."

"Don't be sorry.. I know how you feel. This is all kinda fucked up huh? I didn't think I'd ever see you again and just when I start to forget you.. BAM you're back and just..wow."

"What's the problem then?"

"You hurt me.. you moved away without saying goodbye..and just I didn't know you were leaving. You just LEFT. Everyone that has ever loved me left me.." Meredith looked to the floor and when she looked up at Derek all she saw was pure hurt and anger.

"I hurt you?" Derek said in a quiet voice laced with venom. "I HURT YOU? If anyone was hurt I think it would be me! What do you think Meredith? Did you walk in on your girlfriend with another guy? Um..lets see.. NO. Damn it Meredith! All you think about is yourself. OH and how about answering your phone once and awhile..huh? Don't begin to give me shit about not telling you when I tried all week long. You betrayed me and yet I was still think about you. All I thought about was if you would even care or not. How I loved you so much that I didn't want you to care cause I knew you'd be HURT. You know what I was thinking when they loaded that last box into the truck? I was thinking how I hoped your life turned out great. How no matter what happened that you stayed strong and you ended up with the perfect life. I was ALWAYS thinking about YOU and now you stand here and tell me that I HURT YOU?" Derek slid down the wall and held his head in his hands as he cried. He couldn't believe that he just told her everything he kept bottled up. He finally told himself that it wasn't his fault that they weren't together anymore. Meredith had tears streaming down her face and couldn't bear to even look at him right now.

"I didn't know."

"what?"

"I didn't know you were calling me. I didn't know it was you."

" That's all you have to say? You know what just.. I can't believe I still have all these feelings for you. Have a nice life Meredith." Derek jumped up from the floor and went to leave, but when he turned the door knob the door didn't budge.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" he mumbled to himself. " I guess we'll wait." He slid down the wall again but this time was only a few feet from Meredith.

"You're girlfriend looks nice." Derek looked over at Meredith in disbelief. He knew he was overreacting about everything she was saying but he just couldn't control his anger.

"Seriously? My girlfriend looks nice? Are you trying to piss me off and hate you or what?

"Derek..no. I don't want you to hate me..but I.." Meredith trailed off.

"what?"

"I need you too.."

"Why do you need me to hate you?"

"Because Derek. Right now, nothing matters to me in my life. Nothing I do affects other people. I've had three people love me in my whole life. My mom, my dad, and you. In some way, either I hurt them, or they hurt me. Derek I have no one left in my life and I just, if you still love me, then I'm scared I might keep hurting you.. so I just, I need you to hate me." Meredith had tears flowing down her cheeks and Derek's face softened.

"Mer, I know your mom and dad divorced..but that doesn't mean they don't love you."

" But they did leave. I don't' even see my dad, I haven't since Boston.. and my mom.. my mom.." Meredith trailed off and exploded into sobs. Derek immediately flew to her side and took her in his arms.

"shh..shh Mer its ok, I'm right here. Breath, Mer you need to calm down. Its ok.." Derek kept whispering things to calm her down until finally she was down to sniffles.

"Are you ok?" He swept her hair out of her face and wiped away the tears that were still stuck on her cheeks.

"yeah..you don't..you don't have to do this you know.."

" Mer, I want to." The door then burst open and Coach Johnson came in.

"Oh Meredith! Hi! Is this the young man you clobbered tonight?"

Meredith giggled "I sure do pick em' good don't I coach?"

"Sure do kiddo..sure do." Meredith and Derek both got up and started to walk out the door. Once they got into the hallway Meredith turned to Derek and stopped him.

"Derek, my mom..she um..a month ago today she..Derek my mom died.."

_You and I got something  
But it's all then it's nothing to me  
yah  
I got my defenses  
When it comes to your intentions to me  
yah  
And we wake up in the breakdown  
In the things we never thought we could be  
yah_

_I'm not the one who broke you  
I'm not the one you should fear  
We've got to move you darling  
I thought I lost you somewhere  
But you were never really ever there at all_

_And I want to get free   
Talk to me  
I can fear you falling  
And I won't tempt to be   
All you need  
Somehow here is gone_

_I am no solution   
To this sound of dispollution in me  
yah  
And I was not the answer so forget you if ever thought it was me  
yah_

_I'm not the one who broke you  
I'm not the one you should fear  
We've got to move you darling  
I thought I lost you somewhere  
But you were never really ever there at all_

_And I want to get free  
Talk to me  
I can fear you falling  
And I won't tempt to be  
All you need  
Somehow here is gone_

_And I don't need a fall out  
Of all the past that's here between us  
And I'm not holding on  
And all your lies weren't enough to keep me here_

_And I want to get free  
Talk to me  
I can fear you falling  
And I won't tempt to be  
All you need  
Somehow here is gone  
And I want to get free  
Talk to me  
I can fear you falling_

_I know it's out there  
I know it's out there  
I can fear you falling  
I know it's out there  
I know it's out there  
Somehow here is gone  
I know it's out there  
I know it's out there  
Somehow here is gone_


End file.
